Homeostasis

Lookout

Don’t tell me there is no such thing as miracles,

I can feel my own heart beating.

Don’t say I wasn’t created,

My body is a perfect machine.

Don’t tell me there is nothing to believe in.

For breathing isn’t easy.

And don’t say there is nothing to live for.

My mind is my own best friend.

And when it finally goes,

these vibrant thoughts will still live on.

I will create until the end of time.

Even when I cannot share my words,

I will carry on those memories.

The ones that never die.

Drafts

This year has been the most challenging.  I would say that belief in my personal abilities is my main driving force.  Also, it’s usually best to view things on more of a micro level; the macro can overwhelm me quickly.  Like today, for instance.  Two classes, a creative writing club meeting, a National Leadership speaker seminar and an advisement appointment. Probably hours of homework to follow, as well.  Life is busier than it has ever been, but I asked for this.  When I think of what the alternative could have been, I’m thankful.  But oh how lonely it all can feel at times.  I’ve lost friends due to their new relationships, social time is almost non-existent, I miss my family, I’m living in a city that has the ability to kill your spirit daily,  and I often feel like I have no one to vent to.  That’s not true, of course.  I do.  I have an amazing support system but mostly I need someone who gets it.  Thankfully, I have friends here that are also in school and that helps a great deal.

So while I’m proud of my progress, I am extremely difficult on myself as well.  That’s the way its always been.

In the stillness of the morning, immersed in so much thought, I still am not entirely sure where all this is leading.  But despite my self-doubt and tumultuous reflection, I am certain that my passion will lead the way.  What else is there?

Wild World

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The only ones for me are the mad ones. Full to the brim with passion and drive. I don’t wish to know those who have it all figured out. Because, as for me, I don’t. And maybe I never will. Also, maybe I never want to. What I wish is to roam freely, alter my path accordingly, modify my dreams as needed. I plan to always be free, drifting in the wind.
Maybe I’ll land someday. Maybe I won’t.
Floating just feels good.

Remembrance

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There’s a trick to the ‘graceful exit.’ It begins with the vision to recognize when a job, a life stage, or a relationship is over — and let it go. It means leaving what’s over without denying its validity or its past importance to our lives. It involves a sense of future, a belief that every exit line is an entry, that we are moving up, rather than out.

sNice Vegetarian Cafe
May 2011-April 2014
My favorite job
My favorite restaurant
My best friends
The real me
Eternally grateful

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