So many different ways my clouded mind has been drifting lately. The good and the bad. Oh the bad…It’s been following me everywhere I go. The hurt and the past. Neither of which are of any use to me. I have been hoping for the strength to overcome these recent internal waves of darkness.
I’ve decided to stick with love. I don’t need the countless other negative emotions that try to block out the good in me. The parts of me that were meant to shine.
Recent endeavors guided by meditation have taught me that most of the turmoil in our lives come from our egos and overall fear. This chaos causes much of our anger. Well I refuse to be angry. I’m still working on letting go of my fear. At times it can be difficult not to fear ending up alone, especially when so many others around me have their someone. But then again, I guess that makes me special. My person is still out there searching, as am I. Maybe on this journey to find myself, someday I will feel whole again. Without needing anyone else to validate me. I’m still learning about all the reasons why I’m good enough. I just have to remember to believe.
So love wins. Because it’s all I’ve ever had to give. The broken parts of me aren’t strong enough to hold me down anymore. These new parts of me that I’ve built are much stronger. I’m still holding onto hope. It’s all I have now. And I will not let go.